The UnNatural Disaster that is the NY JETS

Hey let’s hop in our time machine and go back to 2009. Come on, this will be fun. So here we are beating quality teams on the road in the postseason. We come one win shy of a trip to the Super Bowl, but it was certainly a successful season. We have a top 5 rushing attack, top 5 defense, very good receivers, and an up and coming quarterback who’s confidence is building game by game. Our coach is a defensive minded coach who seems to know how to rally the troops every Sunday. Quick let us fast forward to the present day. We are in my estimation the most poorly run organization in the NFL, and we are the laughing stock of newspapers and sports talk shows nationwide. I’m going to tell you how we got from where we were to how we became the most entertaining circus since Barnum and Baileys. Then I’ll break down step by step what we need to do to get back to Super Bowl contention.
After consecutive trips to the AFC Championship in ’09 and ’10, you’d think the Jets would have a blueprint for success in their back pocket somewhere. Well someone from the Patriots obviously infiltrated the Jets organization as a spy and did that flashy memory erase thingy from Men In Black. Yo, Tommy Lee Jones is looking old as hell isn’t he? Which brings me to Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzanegger. Guys, you’re like 100! Stop making action flicks! You guys look ridiculous! Anyway, here’s why the Jets have crumbled over the past two seasons. Mark Sanchez is Alex Smith. They are both mentally weak, and they are at the peak of their potential; game managers. If Sanchez is going to be your guy you need to cater to his needs. Which is really the Jets biggest problem. If you need to have a perfect roster built around your QB just to be successful, then Sanchez isn’t your guy. You want my professional opinion? Sanchez is a bum. A franchise QB should be your captain and leader! He shouldn’t sulk and let his play circle the drain because your owner brought in Tim Tebow. That is the only time I will bring up that guy in this entire article because he’s obviously horrendous and isn’t worth wasting my breath on. Clearly not a football move, clearly for $ and front page headlines, blah blah blah we all know this already. Somebody stuff a sock in Skip Bayless’ mouth and tape it shut please. He obviously gets paid to play devils advocate because even he cant believe the garbage that spews out his mouth. Anyway, the Jets need someone to smack them silly and then sit them down in front of a mirror. If it sounds like a duck, and walks like a duck, then it’s probably a, yup you got it, a duck. Rex Ryan needs to get fired because he’s not the guy. If you’re not going to fire him then at least tell him to shut his trap. Mark Sanchez is also not the guy, so why don’t we extend his freakin contract for no good reason. I mean come on!! The jets have literally done the exact opposite of what they should be doing. And as if last year couldn’t have gone any worse, why don’t we express to the rest of the league that we WANT to trade Darrelle Revis? Yup sure great idea Mr new General Manager guy, lets find the only way possible to get less value out of him. He only missed almost an entire season with a serious injury. And he’s only about the most stubborn guy in the world when it comes to contract negotiations. So lets please trade him for a 5th round pick and a bucket of chicken. All my Seinfeld fans out there got that one. What they should have done was trade him when his value was highest. Unfortunately that time isn’t now so they need to keep him until after the season starts, let him play well, and then trade him for as many pieces as possible. For all of you Jets fans out there that drink the Rex Ryan kool-aid, we are going to do this because we are NOT GOOD and we are in rebuilding mode. Dumb Fan #1: We are? Really? Me: Uh yea we suck. On that note, we need to start from scratch and rebuild this franchise. We need to get a bunch of draft picks for Revis and start to clear cap space for 2 years from now. Rex Ryan and Mark Sanchez need to be fired and we need to start filling all of the holes on the roster. Those holes include : at least 2 WR’s, 2 RB’s, a TE, 2 O-Lineman, and a pass rush. Oo yea I almost forgot, we also need a QB, but that’s just a tiny little detail. How silly of me. So, as anyone with eyes can see, we have a lot of work ahead of us before we can think about the playoffs. Lets get to work then. Think you have the answer to the Jets problems?? Leave your ideas in the comment section below…..


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