The Sports World’s Amazing Weekend

crosby

When it’s 95 degrees outside, you can either go to the beach or do what I did. Yup. I sat in an air conditioned living room and watched sports all weekend. As my Boston people would say, “That was wicked smart.” It was a good weekend to reacquaint yourself with the special a** groove in your couch, because the sports world was busy. Let’s start with the most important (but probably least watched) sporting event of the weekend:

STANLEY CUP FINALS

Following a bad loss in Game 5, the Nashville Predators were happy to head home. Prior to Game 6, the Predators stood an impressive 9-1 in their home arena in the playoffs. Unfortunately for the Predators, the Pittsburgh Penguins handed them their 2nd home loss. The Penguins broke a scoreless tie 58 minutes and 35 seconds into the game, scoring what would be the game winning goal. They would add an empty-net goal 1 minute and 21 seconds later, securing a 2-0 victory. And just like that, the Pittsburgh Penguins became the first team in 20 years to win back-to-back Stanley Cup Championships. Sidney Crosby (duh) won the Conn Smythe Trophy (MVP of the Playoffs) for the 2nd straight year. I don’t normally talk about shoulda, woulda, couldas..but ah..what the hell. The Predators actually scored in this game. Just 1 minute and 7 seconds into the 2nd period, Colton Sissons had a goal erased by a quick whistle. The goal shoulda counted, but we can’t go back in time. Also, Sissons and fellow Predator, Filip Forsberg, both hit the post in the 3rd period. That sucks! I feel for the Predators, as their run through the playoffs was fun to watch. Better luck next year!

NBA FINALS

No sweep. No history. Well, history was still made, just not by the Golden State Warriors. The Cleveland Cavaliers finally won a game (137-116), and they did it in historic fashion. When so many changes are made to the record books, a list is necessary:

  1. The Cavaliers scored 49 points in the 1st quarter
  2. The Cavaliers scored 86 points in the 1st half
  3. The Cavaliers made 24 3-pointers
  4. Lebron James recorded his 9th triple-double in the Finals (breaking Magic Johnson’s record)
  5. Dahntay Jones became the 1st player to get a technical foul from the bench in the NBA Finals (I don’t actually know if this is true – but I think it’s really funny)
  6. Lebron James passed Michael Jordan for 3rd all-time in points scored in the NBA Finals (trailing only Jerry West and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar)

Heading into Game 4, the Golden State Warriors were looking to become the 1st team in NBA history to sweep through the playoffs at 16-0. If they win Game 5 they will still be in rarified air. They will join the 2001 Los Angeles Lakers and the 1983 Philadelphia 76ers as the only 1-loss teams to win a championship.

All you Lebron fanatics can pump the brakes. Don’t expect the Cavaliers to hit 24 3-pointers and score 137 points again. You can also expect Lebron, Kyrie Irving, and Kevin Love not to combine for 94 points again. The Cavaliers are David Wells. They are capable of throwing a Perfect Game, but they aren’t bringing home a Cy Young Award anytime soon. Expect the Warriors to roll in Game 5. 124-111. Warriors win another title. Book it.

U.S.A. VS. MEXICO

Soccer?! Yes. We are going to talk about soccer. Have you ever seen anyone happier to end in a draw before?? That is the question to ask following a draw between U.S.A. and Mexico on Sunday night. You’d think U.S.A. had just won the World Cup. The two nations squared off in a CONCACAF World Cup qualifying match. The match was played in front of 87,000 screaming fans in Estadio Azteca, the famed stadium in the heart of Mexico City. Michael Bradley of U.S.A. scored a shocking goal (from about 40 yards out) just 6 minutes into the match. But, thanks to incredibly poor defense by U.S.A, Mexico tied the match in the 23rd minute when Carlos Vela ran untouched for what seemed like 8 miles before putting home a left-footed strike from just outside the box. The match would end in a 1-1 draw. Maybe there is reason to celebrate, as the U.S.A earned just their 3rd win or draw in 22 tries playing in Mexico City. Pop the champagne……?

AARON JUDGE FOR MVP

Before you laugh, check out the numbers. If the MLB season ended today, Aaron Judge would be the Rookie of the Year and MVP. That hasn’t been done since Ichiro Suzuki in 2001. Aaron Judge is hitting .344 with 21 home runs and 47 r.bi.’s. Yup, that would give Judge the lead in the Triple Crown. Plus, Judge’s Yankees are in 1st place in the American League East with a record of 37-23. PLUS, Aaron Judge hits baseballs really, really FAR. Yes, that baseball really travelled 496 feet. That would be the longest home run since ESPN began tracking distance in 2009. The Yankees are now riding a 5-game winning streak. In their last 5 games, the Yankees have scored a total of 57 runs. That is insane!! This offensive outburst is still being done without future 1st baseman Greg Bird. As good as the offense has been, it is the pitching that has the Yankees in 1st place on June 12th. C.C. Sabathia’s resurgence has been the untold storyline of the Yankees’ season. Let’s hope it continues.

RAFAEL NADAL

And last but not least….words you’ve heard many times before. 10 times now to be exact. Yes. Rafael Nadal won his 10th French Open title. What words could I possibly find to explain the greatness that is Rafael Nadal?? I don’t know, but I’ll try. He is the best clay-court tennis player ever. We have never seen a player this dominant at anything..ever. Not Wayne Gretzky on ice. Not Bill Russell on the hardwood. And no, not Tom Brady on the gridiron. Rafael Nadal dominates clay like nothing we’ve ever seen. Think about this. Nadal just won the French Open without dropping a set in the ENTIRE TOURNAMENT!! The finals was about as anti-climatic as they come. He defeated Stan Wawrinka 6-2, 6-3, 6-1. At age 31, Nadal is finally healthy again, and that means only one thing..the sky is the limit.

With all these fantastic sporting events on TV this weekend, what did you watch?? Tell me what was on your TV in the comment section below.

Since you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. You can also follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

 

So Many Sports, So Little Time

gausman

Wednesday was a busy day in the sports world. Too much for one person to handle some might say. But I’m here, so I may as well give it a shot….

NBA

Wednesday night showcased two NBA playoff matchups. Lebron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers steamrolled the Toronto Raptors (125-103), taking a 2-0 lead in the Eastern Conference Semifinals. Lebron did what he does, scoring 39 points while adding 6 rebounds, 4 assists, 3 steals, and 2 blocks. Just another day at the office huh?? Lebron’s 39 points were special because he passed Kareem-Abdul Jabbar for 2nd all-time on the playoff scoring list. Bad became worse for the Raptors as Kyle Lowry went down in the 3rd quarter with a left ankle injury. Lowry would return to the game, but with a noticeable limp, so I’d call Lowry questionable at best for Game 3.

The late game Wednesday night was Game 2 of the Houston Rockets vs. the San Antonio Spurs. The storyline here was simple: after a lopsided Game 1 win by the Rockets, how would the Spurs respond? And they responded exactly as I expected, with a 121-96 victory. Kawhi Leonard showed the world why he is an MVP candidate. Leonard dominated the offensive side of things with 34 points, 7 rebounds, 8 assists, 3 steals, and 1 block. Tony Parker also had a good game, however, he had to be carried off the court during the 4th quarter when his left knee buckled. The real story of Game 2 was Leonard’s defense, as he showed why he is the 2-time reigning Defensive Player of the Year. He locked up James Harden for the majority of the game, holding Harden to 13 points on 3 of 17 shooting. I guess Leonard doesn’t fear the beard.

NHL

The NHL also put forth two playoff games on Wednesday night. The Anaheim Ducks won an overtime thriller over the Edmonton Oilers (5-4). After an awful giveaway in his own zone by Adam Larsson of the Oilers, Ryan Getzlaf fed a wide-open Jakob Silfverberg right in front of the net.  Silfverberg drove home the one-time winner just 45 seconds into overtime, and this series is now tied at two games a piece.

Earlier in the evening, the Sydney Crosbyless Pittsburgh Penguins took on the Washington Capitals in Game 4. Crosby is still out after leaving Game 3 with a concussion. I guess the Capitals felt bad for the Penguins, so they decided to score for them. Oh yeah, you heard that right. In the 2nd period, Pittsburghs’ Jake Guentzel sent the puck in front of Washington’s net and defenseman Dmitry Orlov thought it would be a good idea to kick that puck into his own net. Nice work! The Penguins went on to win 3-2, and now hold a commanding 3-1 lead in the series.

MLB

There was a full slate of MLB games on Wednesday night, but there was one game that dominated the headlines. The Boston Red Sox and the Baltimore Orioles have an on going feud that began on April 11th. It all started with a hard slide from Manny Machado into 2nd base that took out Dustin Pedroia’s legs. Since then, the Red Sox threw at Machado’s head, the Orioles plunked Mookie Betts, and Machado was thrown at again (this time going behind him). These actions resulted in a conference call between the Red Sox and Orioles organizations, the MLB Commisioner, and the MLB Players Association calling for the feud to be put to rest. Well you guessed it, the feud was not put to rest. Wednesday night, Kevin Gausman hit Xander Bogaerts, albeit with a curveball, as some form of sneaky retribution. Gausman was immediately ejected. I view Gausman and the Orioles as the immature person who must get the last word in no matter how wrong they know they are. But at the same time, can we not throw baseballs at people’s heads at 100 miles per hour? Okay cool, thanks. Good Talk.

In New York baseball news, the New York Mets continued their roller coaster season, beating the Atlanta Braves 16-5. As for the Yankees, they continued their winning ways, beating the Toronto Blue Jays 8-6. Aaron Judge smashed his MLB leading 13th home run of the season, and I’m quite certain he grew a foot taller last night as well.

BOXING

I’m assuming you haven’t watched a boxing match since Evander Holyfield was in the ring, but let’s talk about it anyway. This Saturday, May 6th, Canelo Alzarez (48-1-1, 34 KO’s) will take on Julio Cesar Chavez Jr. (50-2-1, 32 KO’s) in an All-Mexican Showdown in Las Vegas. Coincidentally, this match will take place just one day after Cinco de Mayo. Canelo, the Junior Middleweight Title Holder, will move up a weight class to fight Chavez Jr. at a catch weight of 164.5 pounds. Canelo’s only loss to date remains a unanimous decision to Floyd Mayweather in 2013. Canelo is the odds on favorite to win this match and for good reason. I see Canelo winning fairly easily in a unanimous decision.

SOCCER

Juventus is very good.

 

What did you watch on Wednesday night? Let me know all about it in the comment section below.

Since you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. You can also follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

 

 

One Liner Fridays

tanaka

Good morning everyone, and welcome to the end of the work week (for most of us).  Every Friday, I like to infuse a little humor into everyone’s lives.  Here you will find the past week in sports wrapped up in one line, and one line only.  Enjoy!!

 

No no no, it’s okay Lebron take your time, your decision probably doesn’t effect anyone else but yourself…..

 

Do you think that Chandler Parsons wakes up every morning and throws darts at a picture of Lebron James’ face?

 

Side note that is almost related to what we are talking about: Do you think Chris Bosh knows he is the ugliest man in the world??

bosh-face

 

All you could muster up was 41 consecutive scoreless inning pitched, Clayton Kershaw??

 

Man do you suck.

 

I just want to say something, I’m gonna put this out there, if you like it you can keep it and if u don’t just throw it right back, “I am ready to take Masahiro Tanaka’s spot in the Yankees rotation.”

 

Still wondering how someone can win a fight in just 16 seconds???

 

I would explain it to you, but I figured I’d just let Ronda Rousey show you: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kp1iYmbWCo

 

Wait, you are going to subject us to more soccer??

 

NO!!!!!!!!

 

Which was worse, watching a 7-1 rout or watching probably the most poorly played World Cup Semifinal match in history resulting in 0 goals in 120 minutes??

 

Surprise Surprise, MLB has changed the format of The Home Run Derby….again.

 

They change The Home Run Derby more times than Richard Pryor changed wives (this guy got married 9 different times)!!!!

 

No story was more entertaining this past week than the fat bastard Yankees fan who is suing the Yankees and ESPN for $10 million because he decided to take a nap at a baseball game.

 

I’d continue to make fun of him, but I think his picture says it all:

fat man

 

Well this has been another edition of One Liner Fridays.  I hope you enjoyed them.  If you have a One Liner of your own you’d like to add, please leave one in the comment section below.  Thanks for reading!!

 

 

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!     

 

Brasil Demolished in World Cup Semifinal

 

 

Embarrassed?  Demoralized?  Ashamed?  I’m sure Brasil is feeling a little bit of all of the above.  If you don’t know by now, and I’m sure you do seeing as yesterdays World Cup Semifinal thrashing was the most discussed sporting event in social media history, Brasil got beaten up and down by Germany by the score of 7-1.  Germany has advanced to the World Cup finale and will now await the winner of the Argentina vs. Netherlands match which airs today @ 4:00 p.m. on ESPN.  As for yesterdays match, it is difficult to put into words what transpired in Belo Horizonte, Brasil.  Brasil, the World Cup’s host country, went down 1-0 in the first 10 minutes of the match, and then it was ALL downhill from there.  If you are like the rest of us, you probably thought it was safe to get up and go to the bathroom.  Nope.  By the 29th minute of the match, it was already 5-0, and it resembled one of those tune-up matches that NCAA Men’s Basketball powerhouses use to get ready for the upcoming season.  You know the game I’m talking about, where Louisville invites a team like Southern Miss to town and then trounces them by 35.  Yeah it was like that, only this was the Semifinal of THE WORLD CUP!!  

My takeaway from this game is simple.  Brasil should be utterly embarrassed.  That was quite possibly the worst display of defense and more importantly EFFORT I have ever seen with my own 2 eyes.  Where was the fight?!?!  By the numbers, this was the worst loss in World Cup Semifinals history as well as Brasil’s worst loss in team history.  But, just from watching the game, it looked like Germany was going for a stroll in the park, passing the ball back and forth inside Brasil’s box, just waiting for the right time to shoot and score at will.  Prior to the match, I personally thought that Germany would win, with Brasil missing arguably their 2 best players in Neymar and their Captain Thiago Silva, but no one and I mean NO ONE could have expected this result.  It was a sad day for Brasilians everywhere, but I say forget being sad; get angry! 

 

And hey, there’s always next year…………. 

 

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!     

One Liner Friday’s

peyton

Hello and welcome to another edition of One Liner Friday’s. Here you can find the past week in sports wrapped up in one line and one line only. Enjoy!!

Peyton Manning is very very very very very good at football.

Hey Flacco, I hope you had your notepad and pencil out while Mr. Manning was taking you to school (nice contract Ravens).

Seriously though, everyone should stop doubting Manning and his arm strength and his age and should just realize that he is one of the best to ever do it (NO, NOT 6, 7, 7 IS THE NUMBER!).

Something About Mary?

Oh Yankees, every time I think you’re going to return to form and storm your way into the playoffs, you go and do something like that.

In case you missed it, Big Mo blew a save (obviously against the Red Sox) and then who else but Joba the hut would go on to lose the game.

I still think the Yankees land the final Wild Card spot in the playoffs this year, watch.

I’ve said it about 10 times now, and I will say it again, Floyd Mayweather Jr. will be handed his first ever loss by Canelo Alvarez on Saturday September 14th.

I am looking forward to 50 Cent and Justin Bieber performing for Mayweather as he walks to the ring though (how stupid is that).

Nobody thinks that Cary Williams wanted to fight Riley Cooper because he is a blatant racist do they??

Because that would be absurd!

Hey, uh, Geno Smith, we passed on you just like everyone else in the 1st round of the draft, and we are actually going to play Mark ‘the worst quarterback in the history of the world’ Sanchez over you, but now that ummm, oh man this is awkward, now that he happens to be hurt THIS IS YOUR OFFENSE AND IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN!!

Yeah, I think he believes you and he’s buying the vote of confidence.

And if he’s not I certainly am.

It has been one of the most spectacular and impressive careers in the history of sports, but Roger Federer is officially on the Decline.

2013 became the first year he hasn’t reached a single Grand Slam Final since 2002 (back before he was the R-FED).

His career is not over, and I think he will make a comeback and have a nice showing in 2014 before he rides off into the sunset, but this is the first of many tributes to one of the finest athletes of all time.

Hey, uh, Andy Murray, I know you’re really busy being the ugliest man in the world, but a player of your stature should never lose in straight sets in the quarterfinals.

You know, instead of suspending Ryan Braun for the rest of the season, they should have just suspended him for 4.5 innings.

No?

Oh, that only works for privileged stuck up little children in College Football, my bad.

Who gives out a suspension of half of a game?!?!?

That’s like taking a convicted felon and saying, you know what we’re going to do, forget the whole prison thing, we are just going to give you about 25 minutes in the pink timeout chair in the corner (obviously the timeout chair is pink).

Thanks for reading everyone, and if you have your own one liner’s that you want to post, please feel free to do so in the comment section below. Enjoy your weekend everyone!!

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

One Liner Friday’s

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Hello and welcome back to another edition of One Liner Friday’s. Here you can find the past week in sports wrapped up in one line and one line only. Enjoy!!

Hey what do you know, Bill Belichick does have a heart.

I was actually starting to wonder if he was a robot.

Has anyone seen that picture of Tyson Chandler in a pair of shorts?

Forget one line, I have one word for Tyson Chandler : SQUATS!

I know virtually no one has noticed, but we must be in bizarro world because the U.S. Men’s Soccer team has won 9 games in a row!

Dear Derek Rose, I love the confidence, but you must be high as a kite to say that you are the best player in the NBA.

We all know you didn’t play any games last year, but apparently you didn’t watch any games either.

The Hefty Lefty shot a remarkable final round 66 to win the Open Championship, I’m just glad there were no tents in his way this year.

From now on, I think Tiger Woods should wear Pink on Sundays.

Is anyone else tired of hearing about A-Rod?

Here, I will be taking a stand against the meaningless A-Rod drivel that everyone else is pushing.

I will give you one last line: he cheated and lied, but he’s clearly The Yankees best option at 3rd base so play him until he gets suspended.

Isn’t it sad though that The Yankees are going to rely on Alfonso Soriano to be their savior?

Wait a minute, Alfonso Soriano, Derek Jeter, Andy Pettite, and Mariano Rivera, where is Chuck Knoblauch when you need him?

Lebron left his city, now he’s turning his back on his own country, what’s next? (Maybe he’ll move to Canada)

Ryan Braun bet his life and he’s still alive and Aaron Rodgers bet his salary and he’s still living large, let’s bring out the electric chair so we can move on with our day. #welchonabet

Matt Ryan gets paid!!!!!!

Apparently winning 1 career playoff game is the new benchmark for a $100 million dollar contract.

So big hits at the college level are now cause for ejection, I’m glad the NCAA is attempting to completely ruin another aspect of their game, what a shocker.

They might as well put tutu’s on these guys and let them hit each other with pillows.

Football is a violent sport, let’s leave it that way!!

Speaking of football, Jaws must be sharing Derek Rose’s stash if he thinks Joe Flacco and Matt Ryan are both better than Drew Brees.

On a serious note: I feel horrible for Tim Hudson, who over the past 15 years has been one of the most solid and consistent pitchers in all of baseball.

I feel really bad that he got injured the way he did, and I hope he is able to return to form and pitch in the Major League’s again.

The Mets are not just ruining their own players careers, but have now figured out how to ruin their opponents careers too.

Jaromir Jagr was born during World War II, and he is still playing in the NHL; amazing.

With the start of training camp it’s time to get excited about football, but I think it’s cute that Jets fans are actually convinced that they can win 9 games this year.

4 spot, if they’re lucky.

Have a nice weekend everybody!!

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

One Liner Friday’s

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Hello everyone and welcome to another stellar edition of One Liner Friday’s. Here you can find the past week in sports wrapped up in one line and one line only. Enjoy!

I’d say Ron Metta Artest World Peace should say bye bye to LaLa Land, but clearly he has a permanent residence there.

Seriously though, the Knicks should sign him since he’s the gritty type of player they need.

As long as he promises not to eat anyone’s face than it will be a good pickup.

Why does everyone keep telling me how clean cut and ‘proper’ the Patriots franchise is?

The Patriots cornerback (Alfonzo Dennard) who was just arrested for the second time (for a DUI this time), was drafted by the Patriots just a week AFTER he was arrested for assaulting an officer.

What in the wild world of all things that are holy is Ilya Kovalchuk thinking?

This man just retired from the NHL at the age of 30 and left $77 million on the table (yeah I’m sure he won’t regret that move down the road).

Speaking of Russians, The Brooklyn Nets signed wild hair-do man Andrei Kirilenko to a 2 year $6 million contract.

It’s official, the Net’s are no longer “making splashes”, they’re flat out doing cannonballs in the middle of the pool.

By the way, The Nets Russian owner Mikhail Prokhorov is obviously going to buy fellow Russian Andrei Kirilenko an extra special Christmas present this year considering he left about $7 million on the table in free agency.

I’m just saying.

The Cleveland Cavaliers are the next victims of the I think Andrew Bynum can play basketball movement.

Man, it’s going to be embarrassing when Major League Baseball tries to suspend players again, and they come back with a handful of lint, again.

I don’t care what his MRI says, The Yankees brought Derek Jeter back too early, again.

You heard it here first, Miguel Cabrera will win back to back Triple Crown’s this year.

Yasiel Puig not being an All-Star makes about as much sense as an Interstate Highway in Hawaii (they really have those).

Dwight Howard to the Rockets?

So he wants to continue NOT filling the shoes of the game’s all-time great centers?

Want the list?

You got it: Shaquille O’Neal, George Mikan, Wilt Chamberlain, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, and now Hakeem Olajuwon.

Yeah, that shouldn’t tarnish your already sterling legacy.

You all realize that Anderson Silva still believes he won that fight on Saturday night right?

How happy does it make you to watch someone so cocky and so full of themselves get knocked the bleep out?

If you haven’t seen it just click here:

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OwDqz2P0YTw

Who knew you could be fat and still win Wimbledon?

Apparently, Marion Bartoli was the only person who possessed such knowledge.

Andy Murray wins his first Wimbledon and then proceeds to high five and hug like 85 people before forgetting to acknowledge his own mother.

Way to man up with those bulls Rex Ryan.

I’ve never seen Rex move that fast before, he looked like a cheetah chasing down his prey the way he skyrocketed up that fence.

Nice face Nick Swisher.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ai8D8WMREA

How about you do your job that you get paid millions for and trot down to first base there chief.

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!