“I’m Living A Double Life!!” (DTS Podcast #98)

Madison Bumgarner isn’t who you think he is.

He’s ACTUALLY a rodeo roping CHAMPION!!

And, his name is REALLY Mason Saunders.

This HAS to rank as one of the dumbest things that has ever happened in the history of the world.

I hope the Diamondbacks void his contract before it even starts!!

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Joe Girardi Given His Walking Papers

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Please pack your things and go. Thank you for your hard work and commitment to our organization.

Now seriously….GET OUT!!

Such is the tale of woe for Joe Girardi. Thursday afternoon, the Yankees confirmed Joe Girardi would not return next season. Girardi’s 4-year, $16 million contract came to an end this year.

Girardi’s Managerial Record:

  • Coached 10 Seasons
  • 910-710 Record (.562 Winning Percentage)
  • 6 Postseason Appearances
  • 1 World Series  

Joe Girardi has been a very good manager for the past decade. He managed 1 All-Star Game (2010), and finished in the top-6 of Manager of the Year voting every year (2009-present). Despite seasons plagued with injury, and enduring a rebuilding year, Girardi extended the Yankees’ streak of consecutive winning seasons to 25.

That’s insane by the way.

He also leaves behind a solid, young team poised to play plenty of October baseball for years to come.

Girardi released a statement via his agent, Steve Mandell:

“With a heavy heart, I come to you because the Yankees have decided not to bring me back. I’d like to thank the Steinbrenner family for believing in me and giving me this wonderful opportunity. I would like to thank Brian Cashman and his staff for hiring me and always trying to improve the team,’’

New York Yankees’ General Manager, Brian Cashman, released a statement of his own:

“I want to thank Joe for his 10 years of hard work and service to this organization. Everything this organization does is done with careful and thorough consideration, and we’ve decided to pursue alternatives for the managerial position.”

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Dave’s Take:

I DON’T LIKE THIS MOVE!!

There have been conflicting reports and speculation as to why Joe Girardi won’t be returning to the Yankees. Some say Girardi wants to spend more time with his family. Some say they mutually parted ways. Some say Girardi resigned.

All false.

Joe Girardi was fired on Thursday. There’s no need to sugarcoat it. No need to get fancy with our words. No need to say, “no, no, they just didn’t extend his contract….”

I’m so confused as to what that means.

If it were his decision, Girardi would have continued managing the Yankees. I believe, Brian Cashman finally got his way. I don’t think Cashman was ever part of the Girardi fan club. Cashman wants to be in control. He simply wants someone who wants to be controlled. Girardi is not that guy.

Cashman, who is Yankees’ owner Hal Steinbrenner’s right hand man, drew a line in the sand Thursday. There may have even been an ultimatum thrown in there too. And Cashman won. Sorry Joe.

And so, we naturally progress:

Who will be the next manager of the New York Yankees??

I don’t know. Which is another reason why I dislike this decision. If there was a great manager waiting on deck, or you already hand-picked someone to succeed Girardi, I’d feel better than I do right now. Instead, rumblings bring us names like Kevin Long and Tony Pena.

Candidates: 

In House

  • Tony Pena (1st Base Coach)
  • Rob Thomson (Bench Coach)
  • Larry Rothschild (Pitching Coach)
  • Al Pedrique (Triple-A Coach)

Outside The Organization

  • Kevin Long
  • Don Mattingly
  • John Farrell
  • Trey Hillman
  • A-Rod

Your guess is as good as mine. In watching Yankees’ games over the past few years, I have a funny feeling about Larry Rothschild. He’s 63 years old, so that may not be the direction the Yankees want to head.

Imagine a world where A-Rod is the manager of the Yankees….

 

What do you think of Joe Girardi’s departure?? Like it, love it, or hate it?? Who should be the next manager?? Tell me in the comment section below.

 

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One Liner Friday’s

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Hello and welcome to another edition of One Liner Friday’s. Here you will find the past week in sports wrapped up in one line and one line only. Enjoy!!

Mark my words: Everyone at the Open Championship needs to watch out for Tiger Woods.

I know I know, that’s a really hard prediction to make, but I’m making it because he has found a nice rhythm and he’s got the putter working (he doesn’t lose when he putts well).

That’s a scientific fact!

Anchorman anyone?

The MLB All-Star Game is the only one of the major sports that I look forward to not watching.

It can’t be an exhibition and mean something at the SAME TIME!!

The HomeRun Derby is still cool though.

Watching human beings (albeit human beings on massive amounts of growth hormones) hit baseballs 500 feet never gets old.

Yoenis Cespedes is a beast!!

For those of who didn’t watch the ESPY’S (like me), you need to check out Lebron James’ outfit:

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Umm excuse me Mr. usher, can you help me find my seat?

Whatever happened to the regular old black tux?

So little Johnny Manziel is getting drunk, getting arrested, and is in the process of ruining his future, it sounds like he’ll fit right in in the NFL.

But, whatever you do John, just remember that NOBODY CARES!!

A-Rod says he’ll be back on the Yankees on Monday, I want to believe him, I just don’t.

Oh you want a $25 million dollar contract?

But you don’t have any major injuries?

Oh no I’m sorry I can’t give you a contract unless at least one of your body parts is falling apart.

What’s that, you do have knees that are deteriorating, by all means then J.R. Smith, please sign right here.

Jaws must have been smoking that good stuff when he made is QB list because there is no way in hell that Matt Ryan is better than Drew Brees.

Lebron, Kobe, and Melo are not going to wind up on the same team.

That’s crazy, that would be like Iron Man, Thor, and The Hulk all teaming up to……..ahhh or maybe it could happen.

Does Kevin Garnett know that he’s going to have to coach the Nets while Jason Kidd is in jail??

I’d like to end on a serious note.

This year is the 20th anniversary of Jimmy V’s famous “Don’t give up, don’t ever give up” speech.

I’d just like to say that we should never take anything, anyone, or any day we have for granted because you never know when it’ll all be gone.

Cherish your lives every day, and appreciate the life that you have.

Thanks for reading and enjoy your weekend everybody!!

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

One Liner Friday’s

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Hello and welcome to another edition of One Liner Friday’s. Here you’ll find the wide world of sports from the past week wrapped up in One Line and One Line only. Enjoy!!

Yeah so I decided to sit down and eat 70 hot dogs in a little under 12 minutes yesterday.

Is that a lot?

How cool would it be to be a competitive eater?

No?

Just me on that one huh?

Dwight Howard is about as irrational and indecisive as a pregnant woman.

Listen up Dwight (you moron), go to Houston or Golden State because they are the closest to winning a championship and that’s all that should matter.

Yasiel Puig for President!

Seriously though, Jonathan Pabelbon should shut his mouth and Puig SHOULD be an all-star this year.

Also, Met’s pitching sensation Matt Harvey should start the All-Star Game at Citi Field this year.

If Harvey didn’t play for the worst team known to man he might be in the CY Young race right now.

Need a good laugh?

The New York Islanders will pay Rick DiPietro, that’s right RICK RIPIETRO, $1.6 Million per year for the next 15 years (hahahahahahaha).

The NBA made history when The Boston Celtics hired a middle schooler as their head coach.

Oh wait sorry that’s Brad Stevens.

With the acquisitions of Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett by the Brooklyn Nets, the Yankees won’t be the only team in New York with an old timers day.

Speaking of the Yankees, you know they’re in dire straits when they are broadcasting a washed up, over the hill, controversial, injury prone A-Rod’s rehab at bats in the Minor Leagues.

Although he is their best option by far at 3rd base (oh 1998 how I miss thee).

Why is it that most of these are about my New York teams?

This is not a sign of good things to come (I hope China doesn’t read this one).

Andy Murray vs. who?

His name is Jerzy Janowicz and doesn’t always drink beer, but when he does he drinks Dos Equis.

No, he is the 24th ranked player in the world, and as long as Murray can bounce back from his 5 setter on Wednesday he’ll mop the floor with him.

Enjoy the rest of your 4th of July weekend everyone! Be safe!

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

One Liner Friday’s

Every Friday, I will be writing a new installment of One Liner Friday’s. This will wrap up the week in sports in one line and one line only. Enjoy!

Hey Derrick Rose, if Nate Robinson can puke on the bench and then go back in the game I think you can give it a shot (I mean you are 100% healthy, lol).

The New York Knicks are class personified.

Ron Burgundy agrees.

Ah Eureka! I figured it out, Carmelo Anthony must want to be home for Mother’s Day every year and that’s why he can’t move on past the 1st round.

Are we really still in the 1st round?

Has there ever been a slower more un athletic all star than Paul Pierce?

Hey Mark Sanchez, nice headband!

Does Mark Sanchez know he’s not good at football?

Somebody should tell him.

Apparently Robert Guerrero’s father doesn’t like women beaters, who knew?

Why is it that Guerrero’s father was at the podium in the first place?

And did anyone see Oscar DeLa Hoya’s face immediately following Guerrero’s removal from the stage???

He looked like a deer in head lights, hahaha.

People are saying Tim Tebow isn’t good enough to play in the CFL.

You know you’re in trouble when Canada doesn’t even want you.

Stephen Curry is good at basketball.

The Miami Heat have been resting for so long that Shane Battier has actually grown a full on mustache (can I get a little Fu Manchu here?).

Yay, A-Rod has been cleared for baseball activities so now he can go back to not earning his contract.

I’m glad I’m not Mike Greenberg right now.

He just had mud, whipped cream, eggs, bacon, cereal, and syrup dumped on him…..mmmmm fun!

That’s what you get for sucking at picking sports games.

Did I mention that Stephen Curry is good at basketball?

If you enjoy my writing, follow me over to intheneutralzone.com where I am a contributing author there as well. Also you can follow me on twitter @DaveEttinger2 or like me on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/DaveTalksSports. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it!

Who Ya Gonna Call?? No, not Johnny Damon. Call the Ghostbusters.

Something big is happening in New York.  It’s not what you’d expect, and personally I’m terrified.  New York used to be the example of greatness.  We used to be the place that all others tried to model themselves after, but now we are the example of mediocrity.  Don’t believe me?  Okay, I’ll prove it.  The Islanders are one of the worst hockey teams in the world, the Jets are well the Jets (enough said), the Knicks are having a nice year, but they’re not winning any titles, and the Yankees are not the Yankees of the ’90’s anymore.  As sad as this is to say (I love the Yankees), the Yankees are not that good.  When Johnny Damon is the answer to your prayers, you know you’re in trouble.  For those of you who don’t know, Curtis Granderson broke his arm yesterday, causing mass hysteria here in New York.  Some of the media outlets here are suggesting that the Yankees sign free agent Johnny Damon to help fill the void.  A thought like that makes me wonder what really goes through peoples minds.  Do people enjoy living in the past?  Do they really think that veteran’s will bring intangibles to the team that the youngsters can’t?  Who in their right mind would think that the Yankees resigning Johnny Damon would be a good idea?  Everyone wants to talk about how old the Knicks are, but those same people obviously haven’t taken the time to look at the Yankees roster.  Let me run down the list of some of their ancient artifacts.  The Yankees have a 37 year old A-Rod who is probably not going to play this year or ever again, a 38 year old Derek Jeter who is recovering from a broken ankle, a 38 year old Hiroki Kuroda on the mound, a 39 year old Ichiro, a 40 year old Andy Pettite, and a 43 year old Mariano Rivera coming off major surgery.  Mark Teixeira (32) and Kevin Youkilis (33) are no spring chickens either.  With all the talk surrounding Robinson Cano’s contract negotiations (which are a year away), and Granderson going down, the Yankees season is already in disarray and it hasn’t even started.  Man, I’m really glad Steinbrenner made all of those off-season acquisitions this year.  Oh, yeah that’s right, they didn’t make any moves whatsoever.  Good idea Hal.  Quick side note: I’ve always said that the death of George Steinbrenner was the worst thing to ever happen to this franchise.  Clearly not everything runs in the family, because his kids have no clue how to run the most successful sports franchise in the world.  Anyway, with an aging roster and below average pitching staff, you’d think that the Yankees would have made a flurry of big moves to bring in some young talent during the off-season.  Instead, they let Russell Martin walk leaving the Yankees with literally no catcher.  They let Nick Swisher and Raul Ibanez walk as well.  They also decided not to negotiate with Rafael Soriano due to the devil’s (I mean Scott Boras’) demands.  Hey Hal, do you know why the Yankees won 4 World Series in 5 years in the late 90’s and early 2000’s?  I didn’t think so.  It’s because you had a transition from a great closer (John Wetteland) to another GREAT closer (Mariano Rivera).  As much as I love Big Mo this is clearly going to be his last season, and great closers don’t exactly grow on trees.  But hey, I guess little Steinbrenner wants us to be excited about the signing of Travis Hafner.  Newsflash, the long ball doesn’t win Championships by itself (Exhibit A: last season)!!  Without any substantial additions to the Yankees roster as it is presently constructed, they will finish in 3rd place in the American League East and MISS the playoffs.  They need a pleasant surprise from someone already on the roster, a big trade, or they need find some talent from their Farm system to compete this year.  Otherwise, I think they are in big trouble.  Nobody loves the Yankees more than me, I am just calling it like I see it.

As for the Granderson situation, I have a solution that they should have been trying for about two years now.  Move Eduardo Nunez to the outfield.  Nunez has blazing speed but has not proven to be a consistent enough fielder at shortstop.  He makes far too many errors from one of the most important positions on the field.  If you keep Brett Gardner and Nunez in the order at the same time you will put speed on the base paths and be able to play small ball (a recipe for success that I’ve been begging for for years now).  And hey, if it doesn’t work you can always slide Nunez right back into his utility role.  It’s not like he’s ever had a set position and you would somehow be disrupting his rhythm by moving him to the outfield.

With Spring Training upon us, we are entering the best time of the year.  March Madness is on it’s way as is beautiful Spring weather.  Undoubtedly, the best part of the year is the start of Baseball season.  Stay tuned for my full preview of the Major League Baseball season including division winners, playoff and world series predictions, and player projections.